It is absolutely crucial that my family in Christ understands what I am about to say. As you read, test what I say for 1 John 4:1 says, [do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, because many false prophets have gone out into the world.]
The Lord has called us to be holy. For it is written [Be holy, because I am holy. 1 Peter 1:16]
Paul, a faithful apostle of God said, [Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will. Rom 12:2]
Why is it. . . Christian youth are willing to be transformed from all other worldy things and openly profess their faith in Jesus Christ yet persist in performing acts of sexual immorality/fornication?
5 THINGS CHRISTIAN COUPLES SHOULD UNDERSTAND ABOUT SEXUAL IMMORALITY
1. WHAT IS SEXUAL IMMORALITY?
In Ephesians 5:3 it says [But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people.] NOTE: It said HINT. It does not give us a list of what exactly is sexually immoral but it does tell us that we must not even engage in anything that could possibly hint to sexual immorality.
2. GOD DESIGNED SEX TO BE EXTREMELY PLEASURABLE
God created all things. He created Adam and then he created Eve to keep Adam company. God has lavished us with good things, our sense of humour, the ability to taste good food, beautiful natural scenery and also the pleasure derived from sex. He created men and women so intrinsically perfect that men desire women and women desire men and when the man and woman unites in marriage they make a covenant with each other the first time they have sex and are able to experience extreme pleasure together as one.
Or didn't you know it was a covenant?
3. SOUL TIES: SEX IS A COVENANT BETWEEN A MAN AND A WOMAN
Every covenant in the old and new testament were made through the shedding of blood. In the Old Testament, animals were shed when covenants between God and man were being solidified and in the New Testament, Jesus Christ shed His blood as a covenant with all those who believe in him to have eternal life. The reason why a woman sheds blood the first time she engages in sexual intercourse is because God intended for the shedding of that blood to be a covenant between a wife and her husband to stay united for their lifetime. This is the reason why sex is much more than a moral controversy. It is a very much a HOLY spiritual act and meant to be done only within the context of a marriage.
Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself? Shall I then take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute? Never! [1 Corinthians 6:15]
When you have sex with a person, you are creating a "spiritual bond" sometimes called "soul ties" with that person. This is why it is so detrimental to the body of Christ to create soul ties with someone who is not your husband or wife because then you are committing adultery against God himself since the HOLY SPIRIT dwells within you.
Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, "The two will become one flesh." [1 Corinthians 6:16]
To disregard this Holy act and covenant that God has purposed for us, is to make a decision to disobey God and reject his perfect will for your life.
4. ABSTAINING FROM SEX IS NOT ABSTAINING FROM SEXUAL IMMORALITY
Jesus said in Matthew 5:28 that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. This implies that our very thoughts can be sinful since lust is a form of sexual immorality. The bible says [Flee fornication[sexual immorality]. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. 1 Corinthians 6:18]
PLEASE NOTE: in James 4:7 He says, submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. He says RESIST [defend against] the devil and he will FLEE [run away]. But when Paul talks about sexual immorality, he says FLEE [run away] from it. NOT defend against it or resist. The point I am trying to prove is this, against the devil, it is possible for us to win which is why the bible says we should fight! But against sexual immorality, there is such a great chance that we will not win if we were to battle it, that the bible actually advises us to FLEE from it with the same intensity Satan flees from us when we resist him.
5. WHAT ABOUT ME AND MY BOYFRIEND?
5. WHAT ABOUT ME AND MY GIRLFRIEND?
Dating without the intention of getting married is a definite no no. It puts you at risk of committing sexually immoral acts.
For all serious daters (Dating to test if you can marry the person you are with) here are some interesting facts to consider when setting boundaries in your relationship that will prevent you from falling into lust and sexually immoral things.
Solomon, the wisest man that ever lived said, [Young women of Jerusalem, swear to me that you will not awaken love or arouse love before its proper time! Song of Solomon 8:4]
The proper time is after marriage. However, most people choose to awaken it before it is time and put themselves at risk of committing acts of sexual immorality.
I asked a group of 10 male and female youths between the ages of 19 – 24 years old the following question. “Imagine that you have a boyfriend or a girlfriend(if you don’t already have one) and tell me what acts can possibly cause you to lust after that person and think sexually immoral thoughts about that person or in simpler terms, what acts can you or your partner do that may possibly cause you to feel horny!”
Try answering the same question. If something causes you to get horny, stay away from it. That is called LUST and it will lead to SIN.
These were their responses.
• Hugging
• Kiss (Depends on type and location of kiss e.g peck vs French. Cheek vs Lips)
• Touching/Caressing your partner’s leg or any other seemingly innocent part of the body
• Sitting close to each other
• Sitting in a bedroom alone
• Cuddling /Spooning
• Watching a movie alone in a dimmed light environment (depends on the genre of movie. E.g Adventure vs romantic)
• Close Dancing (Depends on what kind of dancing)
• Flirting with each other
• Seduction with words and facial expressions
• Late night phone calls and texting
• Seeing your partner in tight clothes or minimal clothing (Male and Females)
Things you can do on your own that will lead to lusting after your partner:
• Reading r rated novels
• Listening to sexually explicit songs (Vybz Kartel, Usher, RKelly)
• Watching pornography
• Watching pictures of your partner in little clothing (Bikini, no t shirt)
Christian couples, we are called to be holy. Set strict boundaries in your dating relationships and seek God and wise counselours to help you remain faithful to the word of God. I hope you now understand why it is Christians, the body of Christ must flee from sexual immorality. It has become a natural part of our society. Everything on the above list is things that "regular secular couples" engage in and was said to awaken thoughts of lust and sexual desire for someone else. This is serious folks. Remember what Paul said [Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will. Rom 12:2] We need to be on guard ALL THE TIME. [Be always on the watch, and pray that you may be able to escape all that is about to happen, and that you may be able to stand before the Son of Man. Luke 21:36]